Motherhood
5/17/06
9:23 AM

Good morning! How was everyone's Mother's Day? I had a great time. I love mother's day, not because I am a mother, but because it is a beautiful day to show your mother you care.

Some of you may not be on speaking terms or your mother may have passed. Even so, there is cause for celebration. We can honor our mother earth. We can honor ourselves, male or female for our mothering and caring of our friends. We can also look at the lessons that Mother's Day brings. It is interesting that all major religions have some form of honor for your parents. And while I am blessed that I have a great relationship with Mom, it hasn't always been that way. As we reach our adulthood and assert our independence, Mom is not always our best friend, at least from our point of view.

Now, it is my belief, and most Spiritualist believe, that we choose our parents before coming in the body. I used to tease my mother about my father (they are divorced) stating that she picked him, while I had no choice. Then I became a Spiritualist and have to take responsibility for choosing him as my father. (I love you Dad, this is not father bashing.) Wow! You mean I had to take responsibility for my reactions? I had to actually look hard at the lessons and say, I chose my Mom and Dad, so what did I learn from them? Well, Mom can be a little neurotic and a control freak. HMMMMmmm. I also think I inherited her paper piles... She is also very loving, loyal and will go to bat for you anytime you need her. She is a little bit of a busy body. So, what did I learn? I learned how to create boundaries so I can be independent without hurting her feelings. I learned that I do not have to be in control of every situation. I learned that though I love my family and friends, I cannot save them or take away their problems. They must learn on their own. I also learned how to be generous with myself. And how to nurture people when they need it. I learned that I do not have to be in a relationship to define who I am, but that I prefer to be in one because it is loving and supportive. Thank you Mom.

Now as a mother of a six year old double Aries with Pisces, what have I learned, since we agreed on being paired before coming into the body? Patience, how to be silly, how to love, how to truly fear. Guilt... Wait a minute. Now I release that guilt. I still take responsibility for my actions and I do not hurt my kid, but when I make a parental mistake, like being too strict or too lenient, I can forgive myself as She chose me. I know that I am in an honored position. She chose me. I will do the best I can to learn from the mistake I make and not repeat them. At the same time, I have learned to forgive myself those moments when my frustration boils and I yell over the little things. She chose me.

What lessons are she learning? I do not know. We were reading a book  about minding your parents and why we say no. After the book I told her that it was my job to keep her safe, fed, clothed and as happy as possible, while teaching her how to behave and be nice with others. I told her how much I loved to take care of her and reminded her that when I say no, it is because I need to keep her healthy and safe. That was about a month ago. So on Mother's Day in the afternoon, after the presents and the breakfast. She told me that she thought I took good care of her, that she was glad she chose me and that she thought God was happy. Wow! What an honor.

So whether you are still speaking to your mother, please recognize that you have learned from her. You have either learned how you want to be, or how you do not want to be. You chose those lessons when you chose her. You are a mother, even if you are a man. You have the honor and the responsibility to care and mother your friends and the earth. So I will end this rant by saying that I hope everyone enjoyed their Day.